Deepest Fears: in their own words

Each year, I've asked students to spend a little time writing about what they are afraid of.  For freshmen, this comes during a week when we're focused on loneliness.  

I want to share a few of their answers, because they always touch my heart and remind me that there are indeed deeper things going on in the hearts of the goofball students who I spend time with every week.  I hope that they'll also prompt you as you think of these students and the many more who they could represent!

(And in defense of grammar mistakes... they had less than ten minutes to write!)

What is your deepest fear?

I know the one I loved will leave me one day
And I can do nothing
I’m afraid that I will die before they die
Because I don’t want they sad for me.

I had many close friends ever, but I lost them finally.
What strange to me is that I even don’t know why this happened,
and I don’t know what can I do to fix it.
When I entered this college, 
I feel lonely sometimes because of no close friends here
and not familiar  to everything.
I feel depressed sometimes and I’m not too strong to deal with it.

Sometimes I have something that I really want to do, 
and when I talk to my parents,
and they don’t understand me.

My deep fear is that other people reveal my shortcomings at public,
and I was lonely.

My deepest fear is that everyone will leave me away.
I may be a walking dead.

I’m afraid of lose family member.
I will devote all my everything,
even my life,
only to hope they are healthy.
I always love my family,
although I don’t tell them.

My deepest fear is that I can’t achieve my goals.

I’m afraid I can’t be myself truly.
I’m afraid I’ll lock myself into a tiny cage like a bird lose itself,
like a bird can’t see the sky outside.

I always dreamed that someone I love leave me alone,
because there are some terrible things happened.

My deepest fear is that I will have a dark future
and become the kind of person that I hate now —
the person who lives without a dream
everything in his life is money.

My deepest fear is that I’ll let my parents down…
I wish they’ll proud of me someday in the future.

Nobody cares and likes me.
I become a pest.
I will hurt one’s heart.
I can’t achieve my dream.

In reality, I’m very self-contemptuous.
Although I pretend to be very confident and outgoing,
but if anyone attacks me, I’ll fall down immediately.
I want to improve myself and hide my shortcoming.
I want myself to be better and stronger.
I want to have a real friend.
Actually, I’m always frightened about this problem.

My deepest fear is death.
I’m so young, 
and the world has so many wonderful things I haven’t meet and experience.
If I died, whether have someone can remember my name,
what can prove I have exist in the world.
When people die, did there is another world?
People said death was pain,
I don’t like pain, I can’t imagine.

My deepest fear is someone blame me wrong 
and I have no chance to justify myself.

I’m afraid when you touch your hair
there is a spider on it.
It’s very terrible.

Someone know my really feeling inside my heart.
I only want to share my happiness with others,
although I feel sad most of time.

Hurt others undesignedly.

My deepest fear:
There is nobody understand me.  
And we have no things in common.

I’m afraid of death.
The concept itself just terrifies me
The thought of losing the ones I love and know, 
and eventually lost myself
can really make me feel desperate.

My deepest fear is that I am not good
That someone I love just don’t know me
And every time I see him, I feel lonely.

My deepest fear is that I’m not enough strong and brave.
I’m afraid to lose my best friends or family
When we have some bigger arguments each other
and don’t cope with them properly,
lose them instead.

I’m afraid of she is worry about her study so much
and make herself so tired.
But I can’t help her to get out of it.
I want to tell her the world is so large
And there are many beautiful things in the world.
But I’m afraid she can’t understand.

My deepest fear is that I become a loser
that my parents, my friends who believe me
I can’t arrive what they hope
And I’m not able to protect them.

You ask me how I’m doing
I’ll say fine, everything is ok.
But when you staring at my eyes
You will see I’m upset
even though I’m smiling
I always hide my sadness.

My deepest fear is that
I can’t do things well
and I let my parents down.

My deepest fear is that my parents are getting older 
but I want more time to company with them.  

My deepest fear is that I’m forgotten by the people I care. 
People will die.
When your heart stops beating, 
you die in physiology.
At your funeral, people honor you, 
you die in society.
At last, the last person who remember you die,
and you die forever. 
No one remember you.

I want to catch what I have,
but the tighter I catch,
the greater fear I have.

My deepest fear is that I can’t satisfy my parents.
I am afraid to see so disappoint in my parents’ face;
I always feel sorry but don’t know how to do.

Meet a ghost in the dark.

My dream broken up, leaving me frightened and frustrated.

My deepest fear is that someone I love can’t understand me,
and I can’t explain myself.

My deepest fear is that I am not strong enough
to protect those who I want to cherish.
I feel anguish when I hear that they are sad
and in difficulties.

Sometimes I try hard, do my best;
You know, won some applause,
but through the back of my mind, 
the thing I really care
is that parents is getting older,
my friends experience the most treasure moments without me.

My deepest fear is that I am not confident and brave enough.
I would miss something…
I don’t like the feeling of fear.
But I can’t, just can’t,
to face them.

My deepest fear is that I always not good enough
I can’t achieve many things what I want to do
And I always make others disappoint to me
It’s really terrible.

I’m afraid that I will be lonely
And I hate the feeling of insecurity
That will beat me.

My deepest fear is that I lost myself and out of control
what I really cared.
I really fear to lose the people.
I fear one day they left and maybe that day
I would kill myself and end up my life.

When I was in high school, 
I thought I was great in my English study
and I dreamed to be an English teacher…
I fear that if I can become a good English teacher in the future
and now I’m unconfident.

I fear I can’t do everything well.
I fear to face difficulties by myself
I fear that I will become old and become ugly.

My deepest fear is that nobody likes me.
Maybe it’s not true,
but I’m really afraid of it.

When someone counts on me,
I fear that I can’t handle things he expects from me,
and I fear that I will let him down.

My deepest fear is one day
I’m not essential for the persons I love.
I’m afraid of being ignored.

I always doubt that am I an interesting people?

I also hate someone misunderstanding me because it will hurt me bitterly.
My deepest fear is that I can’t achieve my dream,
or I can’t have a bright future

I’m afraid that if one day in the future,
my mom comes back, whether I will forgive her or not.
She left me and my brother 13 years.
And I always miss and dream her in my dream.
When I was not busy with my homework or entertainment,
I often thing about what I should say to her if we meet,
and if she missed me or not.

This coming week, we get to talk about courage and hope.


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