Spinning and Standing Still

I have the curious sensation, this summer, of all of these gears spinning and moving, needing to fit together so that the machine runs smoothly.  Classwork.  Paperwork.  Fundraising.  Travel logistics.  Finding homes for all of my stuff.  Crumble.  Time with friends and family.  Impending goodbyes.

Having set dates does not, necessarily, make that easier.

But when my heart flails and protests at how quickly time is passing, I remind myself that really, I would not be happier if I had two extra weeks in Bloomington.  I hate just about any type of transition, and it's okay to be sad.

So that's the one part of how I'm feeling.  To steal Imagine Dragon's words:

...I been living in the fast lane
Can't slow down, I'm a rolling freight train...
I am the color of boom.

I feel like the color of boom.  (And I kind of want to start packing right now too.  Not until June, I tell myself.  Wait.)

On the other hand, I feel like I am getting to stand still and watch what is going on.  God is working in incredible ways and I'm getting to look on, amazed at His work of recycling pain into glorious beauty.

Susan and I keep quoting Leif Enger's wise words to each other.
No miracle happens without a witness.  
Someone to declare: 
Here's what I saw.  
Here's what happened.  
Make of it what you will.

Let me just say, that being a witness -- it's wild and crazy.

God is good.

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